we should wear snuggies to the strip club
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
