yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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