Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
how drunk are you?
Several
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
