Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
