I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
