the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
