doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
