Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
