I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
