yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
