Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
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