ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
