Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
