So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
