It's just like the Real World with babies
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
