Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
