Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
