i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
