Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
