I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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