genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Randomize