why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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