I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
