'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
home. puking in laundry basket.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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