we have officially lost it.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
well, you know. whores of a feather.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
