Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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