I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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