Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
her vagine was all disorganized.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
