so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
