so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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