White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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