Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
