im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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