i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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