Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
