All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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