your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
