had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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