it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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