Porn is love you can see.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Randomize
