Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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