my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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