and you said cock pushups were impossible
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
