I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
She told me I should be a condom model.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
