Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
