ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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