We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Randomize
