Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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