I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Randomize
