TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
